Discordian Metaphysics

I, for one, don't understand this tendency of people (most often scientists) to try to ``unify'' things. If you insist on only talking about H2O, you miss all the fun of water gun fights and ice skating, if you take my meaning (don't concern yourself overmuch if you don't, though).
      To go a bit against the grain alcohol, we try to make one thing into as many different things as possible (or just give a whole slew of different things the same name; whichever is more feasible in the given situation). Here, then, are metaphysics and metaphysics.
      Have yerself a party.