Alternate Discordian Beliefs
A Discordian must believe that Eris Discordia rules the Material
Universe -- and that She won it from God in a divorce suit during the
Beforelife, and that the French anarchist Pierre Joseph Proudhon was Her
attorney at the trial, and that nobody is Her Prophet, and that eating
hotdog buns is a sin. All else is a matter of individual
Graven images and icons and pictures of Eris are all right as long
as they are flattering.
Safe sex -- with a condom, rubber gloves
and a wet suit -- is fine as long as you don't fall in love.
You may covet your neighbor's ass --
providing your neighbor is into it.
You may drink, but not to escape problems. (Like the Maltafarians
of the SubGenius Church, you may only drink to create
There is no prohibition against prayer -- which is not
to say we think it is a wise activity.